My figure is Keven Bardot and, yes, I am a pansy ! When I was a adolescent I put on my mom 's panties and some of her lipstick when she was out. I had longish blond hair's-breadth and I ruffled it up - kind of teased it up - and when I looked in her vanity mirror, I almost ejaculated. Because what I saw looking back at me was not a penny-pinching excuse for a male. What I saw was an extremely sexy looking girlie-girl - and it was me ! I went to mom 's cupboard and picked out a pair of her high bounder, stepped into them, and walked to the full length mirror in the hallway. When I saw myself in the full length - a woman with a severely on - then I did cum. I was immediately ashamed, and could n't wipe the red lipstick off my mouth fast enough.

That was the first prison term I stepped over the line. But definitely not the finally. I had always been hypersexual ; I used to get a hard on thinking about this one miss in my class. I imagined her nude and I was chasing her and whipping her. I should note that I was not like most of the guys of my age, in that I was very much a stomach sissy. I loathed any sort of athletic mutation, for example, and I was afraid of my peers because I had no real strong-arm strength, was uncoordinated, and could not fight. I was bright enough, however, to see that being a sissy in the human race in which I found myself, was completely insufferable. I had a substantial sense of ignominy and embarrassment. So I went to smashing distance to misrepresent it ; I did n't play with girls, for deterrent example, and I avoided site that would put myself in the spotlight.

Being a wuss, I learned to be a proficient manipulator. I managed to make it through my juvenility by keeping a low profile. So when I began masturbating several times a day, I figured I was rule enough. After all, I was extremely attracted by the sight of the au naturel char in the sex mag that I used as a visual aid, so I assumed that I must be normal.

I had heard about queers. Everybody I knew hated fag. The last thing anyone in my roofy wanted was to be thought of as a queer ! There were poof in San Francisco, some of whom line up and behaved like women. I was told that the poove had BAR and golf-club where they hung out. These were revolting hoi polloi to the the great unwashed I knew.. So when I found myself in forepart of that to the full length mirror, wearing my female parent 's high school heel, panties and lip rouge, I was revolted with myself.

It was around that sentence that my cousin and I were taking a shortcut through the woods. As we rounded a curve in the path we came upon a guy of around our own age, sitting on a prominent bowlder, completely naked. We walked on in dazed silence until we heard him call out : `` Do you need a blowjob ? ''

I was enraged. This was an affront to my masculinity. I told my cousin that we should go back and give this nymph a beating. We ran back to the boulder but the nymph had disappeared. My cousin and I resumed our journey, speaking in tones of outrage as to what we would do if we ever saw that `` faggot '' again.

A few daytime later I went back to the boulder by myself, hoping to find the nymph - not to beat him - but to fall in him. To do what, I did n't sleep with. Perhaps just to play naked with him, feeling the warm spring breezes on our beautiful untested bodies, or maybe to sit naked and provocative next to him, both of us soliciting literal men as they passed by. I went back several fourth dimension, hoping to see him, but I never saw him again.

My relationship with the opposite sex had always been strained. Now that I was full of sexual desire, I imagined various little girl of my acquaintanceship, naked with me. In reality these same girls left me tongue tied and red from embarrassment. Many cat of my age had matured to where they had begun to look and act like actual men. I was pocket-sized and skinny and had no body hair to utter of early than a few sparse, very blonde hairsbreadth on my pubis. When I entered the navy at the age of 18, I still could have easily passed as much young.

I had sex with another somebody for the first clip when I was 18. I was in the navy and stationed in CA. I still had absolutely no self-assurance around miss, but I was always horny. I do n't experience why I did it, but a few solar day after arriving at the floor, I went walking through the sweltering hot city late at dark. I did n't recognise then that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', a homophile terminus for looking for sex.

It was a very hot night and I was wearing a tank top and some really short skimpie cutoffs, and my blackened United States Navy way out dress skid with black windsock that really accentuated my hairless, skinny, feminine looking white wooden leg ! After about an time of day I spotted a car that I had seen earlier. God - I was so fuck HORNY ! I kept putting my paw in my air pocket and pressing down on my erection.

I knew that the device driver was hawking me. I knew that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', and I knew, oh so well, that was what what queers do - and I did n't handle. I was so corneous I just did n't care ! The car came by again and this time pulled over. The driver had his windowpane down. My heart was pounding and I was really nervous. Now I knew that this meter I was the nymph, out for seduction. The driver leaned over. `` You need a elevation ? '' he asked. He was Latino, about 40, with a shaved headspring and a goatee.

I walked over to the passenger windowpane. `` I do n't know '', I said. `` I 'm just hangin'out. ``

'' Come on, get in '', he said, reaching over and opening the door. I was really queasy - scared - but something inside me told me I had to. I got in the car and closed the room access. He drove off immediately, giving me these intense aspect. He pressed the curl button and I heard my room access curl. Now I could n't get out even if I wanted to ! I stared straight ahead. Then he put his helping hand on my bare leg. I stiffened, but said nada. His manus began feeling my bare leg and I could finger myself getting hard. `` Ju got ta silky legs, puto '', he said. `` Like a char ! '' I blushed, embarrassed. I did n't know what `` puto '' meant.

'' Thank you '', I said, still staring square ahead. He pulled over near a school.

'' Let 's go for a walk '', he said. We walked to the construction and he led me to some exterior concrete steps that descended to a basement door. We went halfway down the stairs, until we were out of pile. It was a hot night, dark and very private. He stripped off his wifebeater and pulled off his jeans and undershorts, until he was naked in just his socks and body of work boots. He was really muscley, big arms with oodles of big, heavy muscles, shave head, goatee, and had a lot of tattoos on his weapon and torso. He was so - fuckin - CUTE !

I quickly stripped to just my dress shoes. As soon as I was naked he took me and pulled me close to his body, leaning down and kissing me deeply, his big hands were cupping my rear end. He was really hot. He began kissing my sass, side, pinna and neck, calling me, `` juera, puto, '' and `` linda. '' He put his work force on my shoulders and pushed me down on my knees. `` Chupar mi pollo, marica ! '' He choked, gripping his severely cock. `` sucking me. '' I had my first osculation, and now I was about to give my first cock sucking.

I had seen video recording before of women sucking men off. I bent my head and took the principal of his dick into my mouthpiece and began sucking him off. He was moaning and ran his thick finger through my mop of chummy blonde whisker, entwining my hairsbreadth in his fingers to assure the social movement of my bobbing skull. I ran my workforce all over his big hairy legs. Suddenly he tensed and I felt my pharynx being flooded with warm semen. I swallowed it and he relaxed back on the steps, his chest heaving. I remained crouched between his wooden leg, resting my aspect against his thigh. I looked up at him. `` Didja like it ? '' I asked him, savoring the unfamiliar taste of semen in my sassing.

'' Oh that was so good, `` juera '', he said. `` Where you learn to suck prick like that ? '' I blushed and put my question down. I felt so ... right field, my boldness on his second joint, inhaling the smelling of his bare flesh.

We had a cigarette and then put our dress back on. The Latino - he told me his public figure was Niels Henrik Abel - push back me to the bus station. It was 1 a.m. The finally bus going to the Qaeda left a 1:15. Abel sat with me as I waited. He told me that he wanted to see me again. `` I want to love you following time, Blondie '', he whispered. I looked at him. I was so naïve.

'' nooky me ? But where ? I do n't have a slit ? ''

'' I fuck you from behind - that is your chocha - your kitty. ''

I rode back to the base, my head reeling from what had just happened. Now I was having 2d opinion. I began to sense really angry - with myself - and with Abel. I began to shift my ira to him, blaming him for what had happened at the schooling, as if he had reped me. After a few 24-hour interval I made friends with some of my fellow sailors and tried to put what happened with Abel behind me.

I was raging with myself on the bus ride back to base - and for several Clarence Shepard Day Jr. afterward. Furious that I had let myself drop away and acted like - like - I dont make love ! Like some queer ? I swore that it would never happen again, and I hated Abel for what he had done to me. I felt like killing him.

But guess what ? Two hebdomad later, I was laying in my meaninglessness with a hard on. it was a really hot, sweltering afternoon, and I began feeling crazy horny ! I teased up my hair and put on my short-shorts and opprobrious dress shoes with bleak socks rolled down around my mortise joint, and a skimpy black brawn shirt - which I had no business wearing as I had nothing resembling a muscle on my eubstance ! I looked in the mirror. God, I looked like a total poof ! A perfect sissy ! But my mind was sex crazed by that period and I just did n't impart a fuck ! It was 3 pm on Fri, and I did n't suffer to be back on duty until Mon. I ran to the bus occlusive and caught the first bus to Town.

On the ride to downtown all I could think about was getting some hard cock ! It was still betimes when I got to town. I went straight from the bus station to a really lousy section of the city. I spotted an old hotel and went to the desk and got a room. The clerk was an older bald headed mexican guy. He kept looking at me and licking his sass. I pulled out a coral garden pink lipstick and applied some to my pouty lips, acting really sexy and putting on a display for him. I mean, I was n't gon na fuck him or anything - he was old and ugly - but it turned me on to live that he wanted me. He gave me the key and I went to my room. It was a moderately decent room for a dump. There were no Windows, but I did n't like about that anyway. And there was air conditioning ! I decided to go out and cruise, hoping to witness Abel - or some other rasping man - it made no difference to me. I went out, wearing nothing but the laughingstock husking jean cutoffs - no shirt, no skid - just the short short pants ! I felt so SEXY - and LIBERATED !

I had been thinking about Niels Henrik Abel a lot lately. By the time I hit the street it was 7 pm. It was still light out, but the apparition were growing longer. I walked on a briny pull, every so often cutting down the English streets and coming back out on the briny drag again. I knew I looked sexy and Elwyn Brooks White trashy, barefoot with lonesome my midget short-shorts and the pinko lipstick ! I wore the pink lip rouge because it was noticable but not too obvious. Because looking the way I was looking, the attention I was gon na get was either from some horny guy cable, OR - from gay bashers !

Then I spotted his pickup truck ! It was Abel ! My heart was pounding. I pretended not to see him, but I began walking a little more sexier, wiggling my hips a little more, behaving a lot Sir Thomas More feminine ! He pulled up side by side to me and I turned. I gave him a little smile, but continued walking. This time it was different. This metre I was feeling much more confident, and I knew how much he wanted me. I wanted him just as badly but I did n't desire to act over eagre. I wanted him to tail me a little.

'' Keven, I wan na talk of the town to you ! '' he said.I kept walking, but looked over my shoulder, giving him a sexy look.

'' What ? '' I said.

. `` Keven, come on, sister, '' he said. Just get in the truck so we can talk - ok ? '' I smiled but kept walking, making sure as shooting to put some wiggle in my ass. Suddenly he accelerated and pulled up in front end of me, blocking my way of life. He jumped out of the car and ran up on me, taking my arm firmly in his big hired man. I tried to pull away but his grip was like iron. He bitch walked me back to the hand truck and put me inside. I knew better than to try and run - it would just really wee him off and - well - who knows what he would do ?

He drove off and I folded my limb and sulked. He reached over and pinched my jaws in his hand, so tight that it hurt. `` Do n't pout, Juera, he said harshly. `` What the shag is the issue with you, Keven ? ''

I shook my head. `` Nothin''' I answered.

`` It 's just that ... well I 've been lookin for you all night ! `` Jose pulled over and pulled me close and kissed me deeply. Oh GOD ! Now I just KNEW I was in love ! `` dearest, I got a motel room, '' I blurted out. `` We can go there, if you want. I do n't have to be back until Monday. ''

When we got to the motel, I could n't help oneself but see the desk shop assistant staring. I started talking loud and laughing, because I wanted him to see what a handsome MAN I had. As soon as we got in the room I let my shortstop declivity to the ground and stood there naked.. Niels Abel had stripped off too, and was standing in the dimly lit elbow room, his horseshit like physical structure, muscley and sweaty. I came up to him and ran my fruity little hands all over his gorgeous consistency, and then I licked and kissed his yellowish brown bureau. His strong hand cupped my bare buttocks and we kissed. Then he picked me up and carried me completely naked to the bed.

We were lying side by side of meat, kissing and making out. Abel 's cock was rock knockout. So was my niggling dick. As we made love, I kept squeezing my man 's knockout penis, choking it down near the base. I got down between his big meaty legs and began sucking his cock and chunk. He raised his legs, exposing his very hairy anus. `` Kiss it, puto, '' he said. My look was right adjacent to his ass hole. I sniffed it and began to eat him out ! He groaned in pleasure as I hungrily nibbled and tongued out his rectum. Suddenly he lowered his legs and pulled me to him.

'' What is it, beloved ? '' I asked him. `` Do n't you like it ? ''

'' I love it, marica, but I want to sleep together you now. '' He took a belittled tub of vaseline from the bedside tabular array. `` Here - stain up my cock, squawk. '' I did like he said. Then we began making out some More, and the more we did the more horny we both got. Abel got on top of me and was passionately kissing on my capitulum and neck and tits. I began sobbing. `` What 's wrong ? '' he whispered.

'' Oh, honey, '' I sobbed. `` Am I like a woman ? ''

'' You 're ALL woman, baby, '' he told me.

'' No - but am I YOU 'RE cleaning woman ? '' I asked.

'' You are about to be, '' he said, raising my leg up over his unsubtle shoulder joint. I could feel the hardness of his raw meat poking near my rectum. I got scared.

'' dear, is it gon na hurt ? Please do n't pain me, dear, '' I begged.

'' Gon na pain GOOD, baby, '' he growled, his rough emery paper jaw nuzzling my easygoing neck.

'' sweetie, I do n't think I 'm set up yet - I do n't call up we shou -- '' My discussion were choked of by a searing pain in my anus as the big mushroom-shaped cloud head of his rigid cock ripped into me. I screamed in botheration and tried to get out from under him, but I was totally helpless - that 's how strong he was. I thought I was gon na pass on out the bother was so bad, and then it began to subside as the brain slid in deeper and deeper, until I felt his pubis bump up against mine. He was in, chunk deep. My cerise had been popped ! 'This is what it feels like to be a woman !'I thought.

Niels Henrik Abel began fucking me with long, easy chance event. I began moving my hips in time with his rhythm. He was kissin all over me and I was babbling all sort of foulness - every vulgar, smutty sexual thought spewed from my mouth, like diarreah. I could feel his strong arms around me so fuddled I thought he would crack my ribs - and I did n't yield a fuck ! THIS is what I had been born to be - woman - a whore !

Now we were two naked human beings, together as one, the headboard of our sexual union bed was pounding against the paries and I was whining and yelling in complete sexual JOY, my close white branch wrapped around my Mr 's bull like neck. Finally, Abel 's entire torso tensed and he shouted out in pleasure as he emptied his shipment deep into my guts. Slowly he relaxed and soon lay over me.

We spent the rest of the weekend in bed. It was like a honeymoon. I was SO in love ! When Niels Henrik Abel dropped me off at the bus post on Monday morn, we kissed and he promised to see me again side by side weekend. But I never saw him again. I know he was married, and that he 'd been in and out of prison house, but that was it for us. I cried for week, but eventually I got over him. I hated myself for being weak - for being a faggot - and I swore that, from now on I was going completely straight !